Figures That Make Me Happy:  Han Solo (With Torture Rack)

This was a basic carded figure. Let me say that again. This was a basic carded figure. For the lofty price of $6.99 in 2007, we got a 14 point-of-articulation Han Solo figure with the massive torture rack device. Now, I don't want to overstate things. The figure itself is largely junk by today's standards, and, as indicated in my 1985 article, I absolutely do not want to roll back the quality of the figures we’re getting today just to strive for a lower price point. I mean look at this thing. The cheapness is apparent and it's sillier than rolled up sandwiches:


But it comes with that massive torture rack accessory, which makes this release legendary. To put it in perspective, this wouldn't fit into the current Vintage Collection deluxe expression at $25. This is one of those items in my collection that I find myself occasionally staring at in disbelief. I highly doubt Hasbro would release something called a "torture rack" today, and if they did, it would assuredly have to be baked into a playset of some sort. The notion of something like this being on a basic card is utterly laughable in 2024. To be honest, I was in disbelief when this figure was announced in 2007. It never seemed plausible.

What I'm about to say might sound like an insult, but I assure you that is not the intent. The Darryl DePriest era felt a little bit like the line was at the whim of a mad scientist. Mad scientists are the bees knees, but you have to put up with some mild madness in exchange for the earth-changing science. They'll invent faster-than-light travel, but then you have to humor them when they tell you that moonbeams taste like lemon sherbet. In the case of the line, we'd get the seemingly impossible, like this Han Solo with Torture Rack, but then we'd have to put up with Hrchek Kal Fas having gold eyes and crocodile feet, or being told that the Vilmarh Grahrk figure is a suitable stand in for Labria. It's a trade off for sure, but in this case, I'm glad it was accepted.

This could never come on a Vintage Collection card. There would be no room for the film out. I am mildly peeved that I don't have a carded TAC sample in my collection, but that is something I am going to correct as soon as I set this article for publication.

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