Micro Falcon.  I will love it and squeeze it and name it George.  This one is an enigma.  It’s difficult to explain its existence.  While I can usually conjure up something resembling a justification for certain 3.75” scale toys, I’m essentially at a loss to do so here.  But I’ll give it a fair shot.

On Monday, I reviewed the unpopular (with many collectors) Kessel Run Millennium Falcon.  It is knocked for being undersized, poorly featured, and overly expensive.  While I don’t necessarily agree with the masses on those points, the Kessel Run Falcon has its merits, and at least pretended to be part of the 3.75” scale line by being somewhat interactive with figures in the line, even going so far as to include one in the package.  That ship is packed with electronics as the main gimmick, and while it is somewhat smaller than the POTF2 Falcon, it wasn’t bizarre in its compact stature.  MSRP is $99.99.

This is the Solo Class B vehicle simply titled “Millennium Falcon.”  It’s so small, there apparently wasn’t enough room on the package to even give it a subtitle, like “Micro” Millennium Falcon.  It retails for $29.99, just like Solo’s Speeder and Tallie’s A-Wing.  It looks pretty much like Lando’s Solo-era ship.  The sculpt is decent and the paint simple but passable (some sloppiness around the cockpit windows).  It has a launching escape pod.  It has working landing gear.  It has Force Link 2.0.

Other than the fact that it looks like the Falcon, there’s not much more to it.  There are negatives, of course.  There is no figure included (which actually makes sense because a figure dwarfs the vehicle) and so feels like a ripoff because other vehicles in the Class B sub-line include exclusive figures.  The escape pod is actually a foamy projectile.  It launches at the push of a button behind the cockpit.  It holds no figure.  It doesn’t launch very far.  The 5 retractable landing gear are by far the best part of the ship.  (Amazingly this is better executed than on the Kessel Run Falcon.)  The Force Link 2.0 activates a surprisingly bland engine noise.  While it does “swoosh” as you bank the ship around, it doesn’t sound much like the Millennium Falcon.  It doesn’t have discernible liftoff or landing sounds.  It has some very unimpressive laser firing sounds.

That’s it.  I can just about palm this toy.  I can palm a basketball, (I do have large hands), but nobody should be able to palm a 3.75” line Falcon.  The features are just not fun.  There are only 2 possible reasons to buy this:  As a super-tight budget Falcon for a small kid, or as desperation by a collector who refuses to shell out $100 for the Kessel Run Falcon, but would have cold sweats without a Solo movie version of the ship on the shelf.  My suggestion for that person would be to get a Hot Wheels Falcon and call it a day.  This serves no purpose in any display next to 3.75” scale figures.  It might go well with those 1” Micro Force figures.  In fact, that’s probably perfect (see the last image in the gallery above).  If Hasbro branded this as Micro Force and included 1” versions of the whole Solo crew, it would be much better (but you’d still hate it).  Nevertheless, I’ve seen these moving off Target shelves.  So what do I know? I can only assume casual buyers want a Falcon, and the $99 version is just too expensive.

I will give this a 1.  It seriously only works as the simplest and (only relatively) inexpensive alternative Falcon for a kid.  While I can find some justification for a collector to have the Kessel Run Falcon, I can see no reason for any collector to own this, and most kids would rather have a cup-and-ball that’s missing the ball.  Stay the heck away from it.  You’ve been warned.