Luke Skywalker
(Yavin Ceremony)
Review by: Chris
Review date: 11/13/2014

This figure is of course from the Star Wars horror movie cross over line.  This is the obvious combination of Luke Skywalker and Stephen King’s Carrie.  I heard that a kid up in Waukesha stared this figure in the eyes for five straight minutes on a dare and that night his hair turned entirely white and he forgot how to speak English and now communicates only in Tagalog.  John Zaffis was called in to investigate and the figure is now housed at the Paranormal and Demonology Research Society of New England.  I am more afraid of this figure than I am of clowns and I once walked seven blocks out of my way to avoid a regional Bozo who was attending the grand opening of a Star market.  I’m pretty sure this figure cursed me with vicious beer farts as I was photographing it.  At least that’s what I’m telling my wife.  I hope she buys it.

This is one of the most terrifying head sculpts Hasbro has ever loosed on the public.  This is the second Luke Skywalker head sculpt in the 30th Anniversary Collection that bears zero resemblance to Mark Hamill.  It’s not even a vague suggestion of the actor.  Removed from the context of the figure, you would never guess this head represents Luke Skywalker.  Once again we see Hasbro operating under the delusion that Luke has chestnut brown hair and on top of that, they gave him a Dutch boy pumpkin pie haircut.  I would like to take a moment to personally thank Harland Williams for coining the phrase “pumpkin pie haircut” which has no known definition, yet we all know what it means.  If the head issue ended with the hair, we could live with it, but it only gets worse.  The head is ghostly white and has a vacant serial killer stare.  This disconcerting gaze is magnified by being another figure in the 30th Anniversary Collection without eyebrows.  If this figure went on a murder spree, none of its neighbors would be saying “we never saw it coming” during news interviews.  They would all just nod knowingly. 

The horrific head sculpt highlights how important the head is on a figure.  A spot on likeness can elevate a lesser figure to “display worthy” status and a terrible likeness can destroy an otherwise decent figure.  That is the case we have here.  Below the neck the figure is decent, but not great most noticeably lacking ankle articulation.  The detailing is wonderful with subtle fabric bunching captured in the jacket and pants that add a level of realism. The rank insignia on the chest is applied too haphazardly on my sample, however.  The included sidearm blaster is inaccurate.  Luke carried a sporting blaster during this scene and not the DL-44 heavy blaster.  Including a removable lightsaber hilt, but no lit lightsaber is one of the cruelest things Hasbro could have ever done to kids.  Fortunately Hasbro corrected almost ever single one of the issues on this figure with a retooled release in the Black Series.  That means there are only two reasons to own this 30th Anniversary Collection release.  One is for the coin and the other is to scare the life out of small children.  4 out of 10.

Click here to find this figure on Ebay at your own risk

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